It is an age old question. Can a man and woman really be friends? The answer is, of course, yes. On TV it seems there is this need to push the male and female leads together in some sort of romantic way to consummate some sizzling sexual tension. But does there have to be?
Sometimes the romance works: Bones, The Mentalist and Castle. And sometimes it just makes us crazy: CSI, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Arrow, etc. You can google "sexual tension" in TV shows and find a laundry list of "will they or won't they." My point is...do they have to?
First lets talk about why, in some shows, the romance and end to sexual tension really works. In Castle the main character Richard Castle has never hidden how hot he found his muse, Kate Beckett. He often commented on how her being a "smoking hot" cop was a real turn on and she would roll her eyes. They dance around their feelings, for 4 seasons, until he tells her how he feels then she, later in the episode, realizes her feelings. Never has falling into bed felt so satisfying. In The Mentalist, Patrick Jane, after 6 seasons, confesses his love for his crime fighting partner, Teresa Lisbon, on a plane and then gets arrested by TSA. The viewer knows the anguish that Jane's character has been through (his wife and child murdered by a serial killer as well as various other love interests) and when he is standing on the plane with tears in his eyes telling Lisbon, "I love her! I love that woman in seat 3B!"...there isn't a dry eye in the house. Bones took, I can't keep count, many seasons for Booth and Brennan to make it happen. Fans, however, felt slightly robbed. They never actually showed them getting together. We already know they told each other how they felt numerous times but the usual stuff, like dead bodies, kept getting in the way. Next thing you know...Bones is pregnant! Huh? Its okay though because it works.
The reason the above romances seem to play well is because its not all about the sexual tension and romance. The characters were partners and friends and had been there for each other in a non-romantic way through many hardships. They also don't overdo anything. On The Mentalist, recently, Jane purposely sent Lisbon on a wild goose chase so that she would not be in harm's way. This made her mad because she is an FBI agent and found it unfair. It could have been written as a huge blow out, breakup, etc. There was some cold shouldering but they eventually talked it out. It is because they always talked things out in the past that this worked. She knew he was afraid of losing her and he understands she has a job but it isn't easy for him. No fighting, no drama, just working relationship things out. As do Castle & Beckett and Booth & Bones.
I find the most satisfying relationships on TV are between men and women that don't have any aspirations of romance, sexual tension or anything else - other than partnership and friendship. It works on cop shows like Blue Bloods and various Law & Order incarnations but most effectively on Sleepy Hollow. The two main characters are from different backgrounds in many ways. Ichabod Crane is a white resurrected patriot from the 1770s and Abigail Mills is a black female police officer of the 21st century. Crane's "fish out of water" needs a friend and some understanding of how the modern world works and Mills needs answers to the darkness that has crowded her life. The two characters fight side by side the forces of darkness while side swiping personal and family entanglements. Its not like a romance couldn't work. They are both attractive actors in every sense of the word but there is no need for it. They have a partnership as "witnesses" with a higher purpose to fight evil, their destiny, but they have to keep reaffirming their friendship with each other. They are keenly aware of their importance to each other and this is not just about a dispatching demons - its about friendship. Crane spent the entire first season trying to free his witch wife from purgatory and when he achieves that end, their reunion is not as satisfying as he, she or the audience would think. There is more satisfaction in watching Mills and Crane interact as friends and partners than in any romance of the long separated married couple. Crane is a man of honor and even though things have happened to shake the foundation of his marriage, he will not give up on it. Mills is there to give advice and help when she can but she doesn't trust Crane's wife all that much. As much as this bothers Crane, he knows they have a larger purpose in life and must never let anything get in the way of their friendship. At the beginning of this season they thought the evil was over and they could live "normal" lives. This proved difficult and the characters began to drift apart. Once again they had to affirm to each other that they alone are forever tied to each other in destiny and no matter what they cannot let that bond waiver. Friendships in general could benefit from their dedication to each other - much like a married couple or life partner. I believe many times we don't treat friendships like life partnerships and they are easily just let to flounder and dissipate. I enjoy watching Mills and Crane together because they are the oddest couple on TV, they are friends and that's it and that's all there ever will be. And as a viewer, it comes as a relief not to expect anything else.
I would like to see more friendships on TV between men and women rather than sexual tension. If I want sexual tension I'll watch a soap opera or Scandal. For my sci fi, cop shows, action, mystery and comedies - just let them be exactly that.
